Let's Talk About Motivation

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Thursday, May 04, 2006

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He Definitely Should Have Been Committed

Yes, commitment is what is called for. He never cared whether a Monday fell on a Friday nor did it matter to him if it was raining or dry. His motto was, "I am exactly where I need to be at this time. Just take it easy, it'll all work out just fine."

I met him many years ago. Let's just call him Tom. We were in college and he was the roommate of a friend. But they were so different. My friend wanted something out of life while Tom thought that life should bring him all things.

My friend worked hard, studied late hours, focussed on his dreams and goals and graduated with honors. He was committed to his success.

Tom, on the other hand, wanted all the good things in life, but didn't have direction, a plan, a commitment to his future. No one seems to know what became of Tom. He definitely should have been committed.

It doesn't matter what it is that you want or are striving for. To succeed, a high degree of commitment is necessary. We demand it from others but, most times, do not ask it from ourselves.

How would I like it if after paying a webmaster my last penny to get my web site working, he looks at me and says, "You win some, you lose some. I'll do my best and see what happens. I'll get it done soon. And when it's done, it will probably work, but who knows?"
I wouldn't like to see my child lying on the operating table and hear the surgeon say, "Well, I'll do my best. You win some, you lose some.

What do you expect from me? I'm like everybody else—just trying to make a living. Maybe it'll be successful, but who knows?"

This I know: I want my web master to be totally committed to our agreement. I want my surgeon to feel bad if he loses. I want him to be committed to the well-being of my son. I want my grocer, my airplane pilot, my friends, my everybody to be committed to what they are doing.

And how about me? Shouldn't I be committed to my own success and happiness? Well, sometimes that's a different story, or at least, that's what I'd like to think.
You see, it's almost always easier for us to see the fault out there than to accept the responsibility for our own actions. Many times, it's much easier to blame others than to commit ourselves to the path of success and happiness.

Yes, success is not easy. It calls for commitment, for focus, for hurling yourself toward the thing you love to do.Sometimes, success asks for blood, sweat and tears. But failure does not ask, it demands and takes our blood and sweat and tears. It doesn't matter whether we are dealing with business problems, relationship or health issues. The same principles apply.

Commitment does not guarantee success. All it does is guarantee that you WILL succeed or you WILL fail. On the other hand, a lack of commitment loads the dice on the side of failure.

Just the other day I heard from my old college friend. He is enjoying the fruits of success.
We talked about Tom and wondered what had become of him. We hoped that he had found something along the way that he could give his life and passion to. Didn't matter what it was, a computer expert, a teacher, car mechanic, astronaut, farmer, whatever. We wished him well.

Whatever it is that you do, give your heart and mind to it.Express yourself through your work, your calling, your vocation. Doesn't matter whether you're seeking your fortune on the internet or pursuing success on the outernet—a sense of purpose and a touch of madness will bring the world to your doorstep.

I have a bit of the former and lots of the latter. Thus far, with all its ups and downs, with all it's joys and sorrows, with all its failures and successes, life's been good. It's what we make it.

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John Harricharan is an award-winning author, speaker and the creator of the ground-breaking "PowerPause" system for success. He has shared the lecture platform with such well- known speakers as Deepak Chopra, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, Og Mandino, Eric Butterworth, C. Everett Koop and others. To learn more about the "PowerPause" and see why critics are raving about it go to
http://www.getmotivation.com/powerpause/

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

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Six Ways to Overcome Fear

As you get closer to fulfilling your dreams, don't besurprised if doubt and fear surface. The number one way wesabotage our dreams is by saying things like, "But, whatif?" and imagining the worst. But, what if I... fail,succeed, say or do the wrong thing, don't make enough money?
With this thinking, as you move toward your dream, you'llalso move toward your fears and worst nightmares. With toomuch to risk, most of us give up or never even begin. Hereare six ways to overcome fear.

1. If you feel indecisive, this can help. Draw a line acrossthe center of a piece of paper. On the top, write your dreamin as much detail as possible. On the bottom, write out yourreality (about this dream) including your fears, doubts and"but, what ifs".

Are you more committed to your dream or to your fear?
Two things will cause you to be more committed to your fear.The first is if you don't have a clearly defined dream. Thesecond is if you project your worst fears into your dream,you'll choose reality because it's safer.

But when fear is placed in its proper place, as part ofreality, it's easier to be more committed to your vision andfear simply becomes something to manage.


2. As you connect to your dreams, you'll often run into thevoice of your "Doubter." We might ignore or obsess over thisbecause it tells us everything that might go wrong. Leftunattended, this voice can be disruptive. But turn theDoubter down and it becomes the voice of the "Realist," whoprimarily wants to know what you are planning, usuallyrelated to time and money issues.

Early on, you may not have all the details figured out,which is why going to strategy too soon can actually hinderor limit your dream. Interview your Doubter and be curious.Capture its needs, insights and wisdom.

3. Your Doubter can provide a list of obstacles based on itsfears and concerns. The Dream Coach rule is, whereverthere's an obstacle, design a strategy to manage it.
Make a list of your obstacles and identify which ones arenegative self-perceptions or beliefs and which ones requirestrategies.

The first step in managing fear is to identify exactly whatyou are afraid if. Just saying, "I'm afraid," can be awhitewash and keep you stuck. Identify what you fear.

4. Beliefs are never neutral. They either move you forwardor hold you back, but you choose what to believe. The way tomove from limiting beliefs that hold you back to empoweringbeliefs that move you forward is through willingness,courage and practice.
Be willing to believe in yourself and your dreams and havethe courage to act on what you believe. Develop this as partof your identity by practicing this behavior continuouslyuntil it becomes true.

5. Are you aware of what typically stops you? For most ofus, it's something we hate, we're not good at, or that wehave no idea how to tackle. It can be frightening and whenthat task is essential to the success of your venture, itcould be your demise. Don't allow one need or issue todestroy your dream.

If your dream is to write a book but you can't type, thisdoesn't have to stop you. Learn a new skill or hire someone.If you can't afford that, explore bartering. Get creativeand get going. The time you waste worrying would best beused by seeking guidance and finding answers.

6. Overcome fear and other obstacles (even time and moneyissues) by enrolling others into your vision. Master thisskill and you'll accomplish bigger dreams with less effort.
Learn to talk to anyone, anytime and anyplace about theirdreams in a way where they feel inspired. Ask what theirpersonal or professional dreams are and explore.

Build an arsenal of people that you can reach out to in apinch. Develop a robust database of brilliant resources thatyou can access at any given moment. Build a community offellow dreamers or join one that already exists likewww.mydreamcircle.com.

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Marcia Wieder is a motivational speaker, specializing ingoal setting, visionary thinking and team building. She isthe author of several books, and has been featured in herown PBS television special called Making Your Dreams ComeTrue. You can Reach her by visiting http://www.marciaw.com